In the week or so that I’ve been here I’ve had to remind myself of a few things. First being the “New York attitude.” You know, the sometimes brash and aggressive demeanor. Frankly, the attitude of people is just not as warm and friendly as I’m used to at home. However, like a lot of things about my time so far in the city, this change is not bad, just different.
Thanks to Amanda for allowing me to think out loud today.
Ok, this view isn’t at all bad…
The unpredictable work hours and a schedule that changes every day and every week. Not bad, just different.
Having a small kitchen that makes me want to eat out every night. Not bad, just different. Well, maybe bad for my wallet…
The state of utter exhaustion and satisfaction after a long day out in the city (working or exploring). Not bad, just different.
The fact that doing laundry and grocery shopping, which once took no energy, now require a lot of time and effort. Not bad, just different.
Having mixed feelings of excitement, homesickness, adventure and confusion. Not bad, just different.
Feeling simultaneously hopeful and nervous about my future and plans post graduation. Not bad, just different.
Having a conflicting desire to push my comfort zone while still wanting comfort. Not bad, just different.
Honesty hour: there are a bunch of things I wish I could change about my life here, albeit temporary, to make it more comfortable (literally and metaphorically speaking). Of all people I know it’s hard to look on the bright side and this week has been both a change and challenge from my norm. Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of things I love about my stay here so far (expect a post next week on those) but this is real life, and not everything is perfect.
However, just because something is new or different or foreign or uncomfortable DOES NOT mean it’s bad. It could be that cliché roadblock that will make you stronger or an obstacle leading to personal growth. Whatever it is, give it a chance.
Whatever it is and whatever may arise, I am going to give it a chance.
Loving reading your posts. It’s a little challenging for me to read and not reply with advice but I know you need to have the experience and come to your own conclusions. I will say that I actually find New Yorkers very friendly. Maybe not immediately or outwardly like you’re used to but most people are quietly waiting to connect with (or help) another human being- it’s just that we have to protect ourselves in this huge, fast, chaotic place where we’re all on top of each other. So we go inwards. You’ll learn to read people and social cues so much better and when you finally have a lovely exchange with a coworker or total stranger, it will be so satisfying.
Happy Friday!
I’m so flattered that you read my blog. My mom said something similar to me, although we both agreed you said it more eloquently ;) I need to work on not jumping to conclusions based on someone’s demeanor or our first encounter. I know there are nice people everywhere and the other interns at work have been a great starting point for making those connections. Hope to see you soon!
That’s a good outlook to have, and one I’m trying to adopt as well in certain situations in my life at the moment! Every little experience, good or bad, shapes us into who we are and are all valuable lessons in our lives.
Bri recently posted…Recipe: Quick and easy dairy-free kale pizza for one
Thanks, Bri! Like many people I’m sure, I’ve learned the most from the hardest times in my life.
I love this perspective on new changes in life, they aren’t necessarily bad, but they are just different. The best thing to do is go in with an open mind and see where those changes lead you, which it looks like you are already doing!
Brie @ Lean, Clean, & Brie recently posted…Getting Back into Running After a Race
Having an open mind is a new concept for me. I’m getting to the point where I can accept that I don’t know my future (long or short term!).
You’ll get used to it more though! You’ve been there such a short time!!! Hang in there and know that you are going to grow exponentially when all is said and done! It’s an amazing experience/opportunity!
Rebecca @ Strength and Sunshine recently posted…Cinnamon Cookie Oat Bake
Every day has felt a little more comfortable. I’m sure I’ll still have days with mixed emotions but you’re right, it is an amazing experience.
The funny thing about the NY attitude is that it’s just a culture of communication and doesn’t reflect how much people actually care! So you are safe with your fellow NYers, even if we can seem brash :) I am not particularly comfortable with traveling, and any time we take trip I have to remind myself “not bad, just different” because I’m a total creature of comfort. I’ve always had the same conflict of wanting to be open and free versus just wanting my routine!
Michele @ paleorunningmomma recently posted…How to Keep Your Bacon Safe – Paleo Kid Thoughts
Yes I totally understand what you mean about NYers. A few years ago I never would have thought twice about it’s definitely different coming from a place where people call you “honey” (which I get can sound annoying and fake to some people). I’m a creature of habit too and it takes a situation like this to force me to change my ways a bit.
Love your attitude, girl! Change is never pleasant to deal with, especially when it pushes us out of our comfort zones. But that’s where the magic happens, eh? When we leave the comfort of our routines behind and try something new. Huge props for adjusting to life in NYC. I hear it can be a pretty rough place, but millions of people live (and love it) there, and I bet it’ll be no different for you!
Amanda @ .running with spoons. recently posted…. thinking out loud #134 .
I always roll my eyes when I hear that change happens outside our comfort zones but it’s SO TRUE. It may not be easy but it is worth it.
Your positive attitude is so awesome! Definitely contagious. I really like your approach of “not bad, just different”. I think that’s so important because when things become different for me, I usually freak out. I will definitely keep this in mind next time something changes in my life : ) Hope you have a fabulous end to your first week!
Jamie recently posted…Thinking Out Loud – Throwback Thursday
Oh I used to freak out about change too (and I still do) but keeping this mindset has been really beneficial to my overall demeanor and experience here.
LOVE your attitude! The biggest change I ever experienced was when I studied abroad in Denmark a few summers ago. It was great, but way different than my “norm” and I really struggled with that. So the fact that you’re willing to acknowledge that things aren’t the way you’re necessarily used to and comfortable with is huge. I bet by the end of the summer you’re going to be so sad you’re leaving!
Sarah @pickyrunner recently posted…Summer without #Boatlife
I have a feeling that once the summer is over I’ll finally feel settled. That always happens haha. Going out of the country must have been such a scary/exciting adventure. I’m always in awe that so many people live abroad for months away from family.
Great attitude pretty lady! NYC is a hard place to live, but I think you are going to learn and experience so many great things that will leave you feeling grateful and accomplished by the time summer is over. XOXO
She Rocks Fitness recently posted…What The Single Woman Buys At Costco Part IV
Thank you :) Two weeks in and I’ve already had little proud moments that made me grateful for choosing this path.
Totally feel you girl but it’s awesome you are remembering this perspective. Also it helps to remember that everything is temporary, especially something like living somewhere for only a summer. I felt so out of my comfort zone when I moved to Italy for 4 months of college but even that started to feel normal a month or so in. I wish I had realized at the time that the conditions were so temporary and just to enjoy it and go with the flow. You’re doing amazing and I think you basically captured life by saying “desire to push my comfort zone while still wanting comfort”.
Hayley @ Full of Life recently posted…Day In The Life #3
I keep reminding myself that this summer is temporary. I know I overreact and make things a bigger deal than they need to be, but the beginning of any changes always feels like a huge deal. I have a luggage tags says “see the world, come home for love,” and I think that’s exactly what I want to do, literally and metaphorically regarding comfort.
I just moved to a new city too and some things are not bad, just different. I think your perspective is good! It’s all an adventure.
Traci recently posted…Lead On
Exactly…the change is part of the adventure.
The 90 degree weather in Pittsburgh is not bad, just different :-)
On a more serious note, work has been a challenge lately. Lots of organizational changes and a new boss that I report to. Definitely something I can say it’s not bad, just different about!!
Haha I’m SO happy it’s been warm up here. I’m sorry to hear work has been a challenge but after a few weeks I’m sure this change will feel normal.
Great advice! I use that mantra when traveling for work to developing countries. It’s not bad, it’s just different to me.
Wendy @ Wholistic Woman recently posted…Summer Cookbook Roundup + Special Offer for Organic Life Magazine!
I can’t imagine how different that change is. I applaud you for adapting this mindset because I’m sure the differences are staggering.
You’re already at an advantage by having this positive mindset. I give you all the credit in the world for having such a great attitude. Like I said, getting out of your comfort zone is going to cause you to grow in all the best ways. :) Enjoy the chaos!
Emily @ Sweets and Beets recently posted…Light and Heavy: Thinking Out Loud
You are the best. I’m enjoying and managing the chaos as best I can :)
I love your positive approach! I think for me the hardest change in life recently has been that I’ve really started to notice the uncertainty of the future. And that’s NOT bad, it’s just different, and I’m trying to view it as exciting. Living day-by-day is hard for a planner (like me!), but I’m getting used to it – albeit slowly :) I’m excited to keep hearing about your experience this summer!
Ellen @ My Uncommon Everyday recently posted…Thinking Out Loud #17
Good for you for viewing the future as exciting! I get mixed emotions about it daily. But it really is exciting, even if I don’t have a set plan.
Change in life is so inevitable, but it can feel, like you said, ‘different’. Now that I am out of school and not constantly rushing from assignments to classes to studying for tests, I am not sure what to do with myself. Sure being busy is not necessarily bad, but it feels different having the choice to do whatever I feel like doing at the moment. I know you will make it through any tough times :).
Niki @lifewithniki recently posted…My First Ever Thinking Out Loud!
Thanks for your comment, Niki. Every time I’m on a break from school I get that feeling too. I graduate in December so I’m expecting to have that “different” feeling during that change in my life.
Glad you have this as “not bad, just different”. I’ve been in the northeast all my life (Even though MD is a weird middle transition into mid atlantic with some southern aspects) so I’m used to it. It’s hard for me to go anywhere else because it all seems so slow and strange, haha!
Lauren recently posted…Get Started with Juicing {LaurenLivesHealthy E-book Review}
It’s weird to think that a few years ago I knew nothing but life in the northeast and now it feels foreign to me. Just shows you can adjust to wherever you are!
awesome post! I totally get what you mean about the whole New York City attitude!
xx, kenz
kenzie negron recently posted…Saving Money Throughout College PART 2: FOOD
Thank you! I’m slowly getting used to the culture up here. It’s very different from the south.
I think you looked inside my brain for this post – I feel the same way about my own move. There are things I love (all the metro parks, for example) and things I don’t (why does everyone drive so slowly!), but in the end it’s just all different. I think it’s cool you get to try living in a big city for a few months and see how you like it!
Rebecca @ MyEagerFeet recently posted…Home
I’m so glad it resonated with you. Yes that’s exactly why I wanted to live here this summer…so I could get a taste of what life is like here. Good luck at your marathon this weekend!
I love this post. I try to be as resilient as possible and adjust to my new surroundings, but sometimes I have to let myself get a little bummed that I can’t adjust as quickly… eventually, it’ll work itself out.
Thanks, Julie! I wish I was one of those people who could pick up and quickly adjust anywhere. I definitely require an adjustment period of a few weeks! It’s hard to believe sometimes that things will work out for themselves, but that really seems to be the case.
I am saddened to hear people have not been friends to you! If I recall correctly, I was actually astounded by the fact that people were so kind to me! Maybe I just got lucky? Anyway, sorry to hear people have been rash with you!
I LOVE how open you are to this experience. I would be so uncomfortable being in a new place and I know I would have some difficulty adjusting to such a huge change, and I really think you are taking it like a champ. <3
“Being home is not bad, just different."
Julia @ Lord Still Loves Me recently posted…Link Love: June 14th, 2015
People haven’t been directly mean to me, it’s just the general vibe that they give to everyone. I’m overly friendly at times and I think it can be too intense (if that makes sense). Thanks for your sweet words, I’d like to think I’m handling this adjustment well ;)
Change is hard….even temporary change. I’ve lived in North Carolina for the last (almost) 7 years and I still feel like a fish out of water. There are things I love about my life there like the friends I’ve made. But, there are always going to be things that are such a foreign concept that home seems like a world away. Try to find the very best one thing that you love about where you are right now (a group, a restaurant, a spot to sit) and just use that as your “home base” for while you’re there. Best wishes!
AmberLynn Pappas recently posted…High Five a Stranger!
That’s a great perspective. I’m SO bad with change. I <3 my creature comforts, familiarity, and the things that I'm 'used to' but I have to remember that most change is usually for the better. So I would say that 'My brother moving out to start out on his own last year was not bad, just different.' We're still good friends, and I've seen him grow a lot over the past year. So all in all, it's been a good thing.
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I am a creature of habit and despise change so learning to accept it will probably always be hard for me. I’m glad that you and your brother can stay good friends after he moved. I think after I left home for college my sister and I got closer.